Dolph Ziggler comes out and he says he has been coming out and exposing the elaborate entrances of these so called superstars who could not lace his boots. Dolph says he is the greatest in ring performer in WWE history, yet you still don’t get it.
Dolph goes to the back and he comes out Dolph comes out to Triple H’s entrance. Dolph asks if that was fun or cool. He asks if he can run NXT now. He says it is harder to spit water than you think. Dolph says he could do something to stop the show.
Dolph then comes out to Shawn Michaels’ music. Dolph says it doesn’t get any more superficial than that. Dolph says he can feel himself losing his smile. Dolph says he can go lower. Dolph comes out to DX’s music and he mocks Billy Gunn. Dolph says he has two words for you . . . Who cares. Who cares about two dads who try to be relevant and coast off into retirement. You don’t care about in ring performance, or lack thereof. You don’t care. Dolph says he is the best ever. Dolph says you couldn’t care less and he does not care about you.
Shane McMahon’s music plays and Kevin freaks out. Instead of Shane, it is Dolph Ziggler dressed like Shane and doing the Dolph-O Dance. Dolph says he tried a new entrance and he will put it in the maybe file. Dolph goes to the back.
Dolph Ziggler makes his way out onto the stage. He says last week he came out here to show that these so called elaborate entrances are done by wannabe superstars who can’t lace his boots. Dolph says he is the greatest in ring performer in WWE history. He says he shouldn’t need an elaborate entrance to make you think he is a star. Dolph says if that is what you want . . . fine. Dolph comes out using Bayley’s entrance. Dolph wants to know if that is superficial enough for you. Are we having fun? The sad reality is that at some point that bell has to ring and the performer has to compete. Dolph says that reminds him of the biggest waste of them all. Someone who cannot hold a candle to him, yet you idolize him.
Dolph comes out as the Ultimate Warrior. Dolph says this is what it has come to. Tassels, face paint, sprinting to the ring, blow up dolls, and running like an idiot. This is what you think makes you a star. Anyone can do what he just did. No one can do what he does in this ring. No one. Each and every one of you couldn’t care less. Dolph says he couldn’t care less about you.
Dolph Ziggler comes out to the stage and he has a mic. Dolph says all of you here tonight and the WWE Universe have no appreciation for what he can do in the ring. You would rather sit on your hands and sit unsatisfied with the greatest performer in WWE history in front of you. Shame on all of you. You don’t want him. You would rather have some dumb gimmick.
Dolph goes to the back. John Cena’s music plays and Dolph Ziggler comes out wearing a John Cena hat. Dolph asks if that worked for you. You saw right through that. How about some nostalgia. Dolph goes to the back and . . . Randy Savage’s music plays. Dolph asks if you are not buying that because you usually buy that nostalgia crap.
Dolph asks for the lights to be turned down. Naomi’s music plays and Dolph comes out with a Naomi glowing wig. Dolph asks if this is what has come to. Anyone can do what he just did. Anybody. No one can what he does in that ring. Since you couldn’t care less, Dolph says he doesn’t give a damn about you. You all make him sick.
Backstage: We go to the interview area and Dolph Ziggler is there. Dolph is asked about the new side of him that he was going to reveal. He says we are in Little Rock so you can expect nothing. He is asked what has motivated his desire for change. He says being the best athlete in Sports Entertainment but having nothing to show in ten years. He says he is a star. People get distracted by twinkling lights, sequinned jackets, and the John Cena hand gesture.
Dolph asks if you want to see him playing a guitar or riding a motorcyle to the ring. He can get on a dumb four wheeler like Stone Cold and he can spill beers on himself. He can have paint poured on him and ignore that he is a charisma vaccum. He can have a beautiful woman escort him to the ring. He can be a superhero. If you want all flash and no substance, you will get that next week.
Backstage: Dasha welcomes back the returning Dolph Ziggler. He is asked what are we to expect from Dolph Ziggler. He says he is excited to reestablish himself in a…backstage segment. He says he was watching a lot of Raw and Smackdown. He has unlocked the key to what it takes to be a star in WWE. He says he is going to start singing. He is going to play the guitar. He will rap. He will dance around like an idiot. He says he will have a single spotlight and lasers. He will have a big fancy robe. He will have beautiful women escort him to the ring, not any woman, but a woman who glows in the dark. Dolph says that is what he plans on doing…next week.
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